Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris doesn't flush the toilet... he scares the crap out of it.


Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.


Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack. His heart isn't foolish enough to attack him.


Chuck Norris can light a fire by rubbing two ice-cubes together.


Chuck Norris uses a stunt double during crying scenes.


Chuck Norris once urinated in a semi truck's gas tank as a joke. That truck is now known as Optimus Prime.


Giraffes were invented when Chuck Norris laid an uppercut to a horse.


Chuck Norris met an exclamation point and punched it in the face. We now have questions.
 
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